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4th Sep, 2002

I've been told that some people find me to be a condescending asshole online.

Certainly I'll not present myself as false just to be friends with you. I'll say what I feel about you, and your views, to your face, not behind your back.

When I explain something I'll explain it as clearly and as simply as possible. This happens for two reasons:
#1 - It helps cause less confusion about what I mean, and makes my point clearer.
#2 - I've been used to teaching primary school kids issues through drama, so that where my teaching experience comes from

Perhaps this makes me condescending. If it does then I didn't know about it. Is it condescending to try and make sure everyone understands by explaining clearly and simply?
Maybe. Am I a condescending asshole?
Perhaps. I don't know about that, take me as you find me. I'll tell you what I am though.
I'm tired.

Tired of people that expect to tell you that you are wrong without explaining why they are right.
Tired of people who think they are better than anyone else. Newsflash, you're not.
Tired of people taking the internet so fucking seriously. We don't have the ability to express the same range of emotion here as we do even on the phone. Calm down and take a step back for Christ's sake, it probably wasn't meant like that, and if it was.. so what?
Tired of petty little arguments that mean nothing and are treated as if they are the end of the world.
Tired of stupid little squabbles behind my or other peoples back. Say something to my face if you have a problem with me. I can deal, I'm a adult.
Tired of people assuming I'm angry because I object to something they've said. Another newsflash: I'm not, I'm trying to put my point across too, then we can talk about it like adults not some pathetic school yard brawl.

I'm also physically tired right now. I don't know why. I've had a long weekend, I've got money troubles, but even that shouldn't make me this tired. Whatever the cause it has made me a bit narky. My patience is a little thinner and my temper a bit shorter. Not that this makes much difference, as I've not really got angry for quite a while... even so.. the patience is less, so I may be blunter with you than normal. I won't insult you though. So don't take it that way..

this is me. DC the Asshole. Ta-ta for now.

to the person who told me this, none of this is directed at you. So you know


( 10 comments — Leave a comment )
3rd Sep, 2002 17:00 (UTC)
I understand everything you're saying and definitely don't think you're an asshole babe. You're amazing and a wonderful friend. I appreciate everything you do. This person who said this obviously isn't a good friend. *hugs* You're great. Get some rest babe. You've got a lot on your shoulders right now AND you're physically exhausted. *tucks him in*
3rd Sep, 2002 17:31 (UTC)
no she's a good friend. The people that originally say this don't know me that well so it doesn't bother me that much.

It bothers me that I came across that way with out knowing it.

It also bugs that half the time they seem to be guilty of the same thing.
3rd Sep, 2002 18:15 (UTC)
This person who said this obviously isn't a good friend.

Only a good friend has the guts to tell someone when they're being dumb or when others think they're being dumb.
3rd Sep, 2002 18:32 (UTC)
Agreed. I think that the wires got messed and Kali thought that they were talking about me, rather than relaying...
4th Sep, 2002 02:00 (UTC)
I've never found you to be anything but absolutely and genuinly adorable online.
4th Sep, 2002 11:27 (UTC)
thank you. I guess one reason people from the Eve community may find that is that I am in a position of power and responsibility.. I take being a moderator very seriously.

So I'm sure I can be an asshole then.. but then again I'm only enforcing the rules.

*shrug* Of cource if I ever am like that then I expect you all to put me down for it :)
4th Sep, 2002 03:15 (UTC)
Okay, here's the thing.... I don't know you... I won't pretend to know you. I stumbled upon you and am very glad I have. I love brutal raw honesty... the moments where we shake on the inside a bit. If you feel scared to say something that is probably the right time and the exact thing that needs to be said. I don't want to be left behind in some cliche, I want the hard parts and often times that comes from truth, and it is hard because in some part it is real to us. Change... grow... move... and it isn't always easy but having someone say it like it is (from their subjective perception of course;) matters. It really matters.

So while, I came upon you unexpectedly, I'm staying by choice. I'm terrible at social cultural hoop jumping for getting to know people and conversations, so this is as formal as my "Hello." and introduction goes. I do hope (and not in that just-to-be-nice-way) we really can talk. I'm drawn in by your powerful convictions. It is a glorious thing to behold.

Thank you... for being honest.
4th Sep, 2002 11:23 (UTC)

Thanks. I don't know how to follow that, so I'll say this: I agree with you. IF only more people would say what they mean and feel I think we'd all be a lot happier.

Never be afraid of the truth...
4th Sep, 2002 07:10 (UTC)
The world is full of dumb shits anyway. Just carry on being as you are.
4th Sep, 2002 11:28 (UTC)
Well I haven't changed to become like that.. so I won't change to accomodate them.

Mind you.. that said. If I AM appearing like that without knowing then it would be good for me to know when.. so I can find out why and what causes it.
( 10 comments — Leave a comment )