February 2nd, 2003

black feelings

well shit...

today looked like it was going well...

then the shuttle crash happened... which sucked, but to be honest.. I'm so far away from it here its like hearing about an earthquake in China. Sure its bad.. but well... its something bad far away.

Not saying thats right... but I guess I grew up hearing tales of bombs going off much closer to home, so perhaps I'm desensitised.

Then just as it was going well again... (saw Catch Me If You Can - a film I highly recomend.. but more on that at a later date) it got sucky again.

Maizie, my sisters pet chinchilla, died while we were out. My sister is rather upset... but it was when she seemed to be upset not about the death (as such.. I mean I know she is) but at that she wasn't involved (it always came down to her... and perhaps thats part of grieving, but I've not seen it in grief before).. thats when.. after holding her and soothing her for about half an hour while my parents watched tv I let them take over.

So yes.... fabulous. Not that a chinchilla is a huge thing in life and all... but she was still Maizie, and we'd all been routing for her (she'd had such a crappy life up till when my sister started taking care of her.. and theres another long story). I guess, as I told Romany... sometimes things just die. You can't always be there. *sighs*

Anyone else want to die today? Guess feburary had to start with a bang.. January being the month of frigging death that it was (everyone I know has had someone they know die, or be seriously hurt, or become seriously ill, or murdered in one case).

Yay for the new year... ring in some cheer.

Like fuck.
  • Current Music
    Theory of a Deadman - The Last Song
fishy wishy


in a bit of a funk today...

however I shall be watching The Sixth Sence tonight..so perhaps that will break me out of it.

I've got a few things I want to write today.. and done NONE of them.. maybe later..